In my birth religion, we baptise the youth as member into the church at the age of 8, and not at birth, like the naughty Catholics and other denominations. There is no way a newborn can choose if they want to be Catholic right when they are born…they can’t even speak. But 8 year olds, they are very, very ready to make a life time commitment to a religion. They know right and wrong and they have enough sins accumulated in their 8 years of life, that a cleansing is necessary.
9 years ago, Our Sarah Joy Paul was born. I have watched this child with curiosity and attention in a way that my first two daughters didn’t receive. When the oldest were growing up, I was too. While Sarah was growing up, I had reached a point in my life where I had figured one or two things out. I had passed my age of peak energy and mental and physical speed. I was an observer way more than an active parent. I didn’t even see myself as a parent with her. I actually felt she came to our family to help us all stay together and love one another. I am a parent only in order of operations, I came before her.
I have watched her go through stages of growth that could be considered hard for parents. She is very neurodivergent, and it’s the most beautiful thing ever. She acts exactly how her body feels, and says exactly what her mind thinks. I can’t even imagine a human more truthful and honest than this kid. Around 6 years of age, she learned all the swear words from dad and her sisters. This was a fascinating time, because she was so good at using them in sentences. We were fortunate that she saved her sailor mouth for home and not at her montessori school. Interestingly enough, that phase has all but passed. She lives better than that now, and has more control of her mouth than the rest of us.
At times where she was so frustrated in her skin and mind and said things she was feeling, I would look at her and start to cry with absolute joy and love. She knew I knew what it was like being in this human body with these insane emotions. Anytime she escalates, I can find a way to be with her and hold her heart with mine.
I have had moments with almost every human alive where I didn’t like them for a moment…times where I really am not sure I unconditionally love them. That is why Sarah is my little angel. I cannot imagine anything she could do that would ever make me do anything but love her. She is such a wise human being and I am so glad I get to learn from her until the day I die.
She knows the truth about love. I am so excited to have her learn about Catholicism when we go to Italy this June. We will stay a week next to the Vatican and learn about everything that location can offer. She has traveled the world and has the most fascinating questions about all the people we meet and why the do the things they do.
One day she will learn more about Jesus from living here in Utah. I am so excited to see how she feels about the story. She knows the concept right now, but not enough to join a religion full time, even though she is a 9 year old. I am sure she will find a form of worship that works for her in the future. It will be her own choice. It will be supported by mom and dad and all her sisters. Maybe she doesn’t feel the need to worship anything or anyone. Right now it feels like dragons might be her favorite power to worship.
“Sarah, dragons aren’t real” has never slipped out of my mouth. They are as real as anything else I’ve been taught in my life, tbh.
Happy Sunday,
SP
Dragons better be real!
I LOVE THIS. I have a 13 year old, 8 year old and 3 year old. My 13 year old much like me .. neurodivergent and his filter is non existent. It gets him in trouble at school because he doesn’t stop and think before he says or does something totally bizarro 😂
The 13 chose to be baptized all on his own last Oct and I have no intention of encouraging the others to - I prefer them to approach me about it in their own time. We have not been a religious family in their lifetime - I am a very spiritual human that studies many different spiritual modalities - but my grandma took me to her non denominational church as a child when she had me over and I witnessed demons leaving the body of a lady one afternoon (forever changed my life).
From that day forward - no one could convince me that this world wasn’t made up of light and darkness, evil and good, even if I still test(ed) the world in my own way until I was an adult.
I try to let my kids be themselves- even if I shake my head at times in wonder about where they’ll end up some day - some days I like them and some days I don’t 😂 I admire your transparency so much. My 13 year old talks like an ol’ sailor like his mama and does it so naturally - somehow he stops himself when at school - funny how he “can’t” at home with me.